The Well Stressed Monkea

You might remember viral monkey (think Youtube, not Outbreak) that was caught in an Ikea wearing a very expensive sheepskin coat.  Well it looks he will be more inmate than primate this season (nailed it) as this little guy, named Darwin, will spend Christmas locked in a cage.  The worst part is, there’s no chimney, no Santa, and no stockings hung with care.  Apparently the owner is fighting for custody in court and in the meantime, this poor guy is living at an animal sanctuary.  Now I get that it is illegal to own a monkey.  I don’t own one (technically), nor do I recommend it.  However, more time and money should be put into investigating if she is a good animal owner.  She obviously broke the law, that much is clear, but if she moves to a place that doesn’t forbid owning monkey’s (which she plans on doing), what’s the harm?  Why make the simian suffer, especially on Christmas?  This is not the life this little guy has become accustomed to, and depriving this guy of the latest Milan-inspired fashions is the TRUE crime here.

The Well Dressed Monkea

This story is about a monkey, in a stylish coat and a diaper, who got loose in an Ikea store in Ontario.  It wasn’t specified, but I do not believe he purchased the coat there.  I don’t really have a lot to say, other than I didn’t think I would hear the term “Well Dressed” and “Dapper” applied to any monkey other than Lancelot Link Secret Chimp (Look it up under 30 crowd.  It’s a perfect reference).  The chimp is fine, but it is still up in the air if the original owners will get the monkey back.  It’s an illegal pet in Ontario.