If you live to see it, 96 is the age where you finally become a great grandfather, not a great father.  In India, there is a 96 year old man who just fathered a baby.  This is incredible for several reasons that I shall list below, since that is my MO:

1.  He is 96 six and still getting laid.  That is how babies are made.  His skills as a mack have yet to fade.

2.  Peta is using him as their poster child for all things virile.  Apparently he is a life long vegetarian, and is attributing the strength of HIS meat to the lack of ingesting it.

1.  This goofy looking dude is getting laid at 96!  Where does he find the stamina?  And he scoffs at Viagra.  This guy is like the Dos Equis “most interesting man in the world”.

3.  96?  You sure he’s not 69?  Right?  All the college kids know what I’m talking about.   You ever wonder why it’s called “69”ing and not “bq”ing?  I guess that’s too close to BBQ.  No one wants a sex act that reminds them of charred dead animal flesh.  I would rather “96” someone anyway.  Back to back so I can get some sleep.  Who needs the rigors of sex anyway?  I have to go to work in the morning.

Uh oh, maybe I should become a vegetarian.